As we all know, the first ten million is always the hardest (Except for the Spectre, we made our money in knock-off Pokemon cards), but once you get there, the first thing you need is a yacht, a gambling and Vodka addiction, and of course, an unsutably young Russian bride!
Wrong! Russian mail order ladeez are sooo last century, now, in living proof that fashion (and despair) repeats itself, the gentleman who can’t buy class or elan should again look East; To Chnlove.com to be precise!
Yep, it’s an innapropriately named and marketed-through-facebook site that promises you ‘pretty chingirls’ looking for (and I quote) ‘wealthy westernmen’ . I was under the expression a pretty chingirl meant Reese Witherspoon, but hey, you can’t take it with you right? Grab yourself agold-digging harridan now!
LINK
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As any 5 year old child knows, the best way to cure the economic crisis is obviously to print your own cash, thus further devaluing the cantralised banking system right? Right. (I mean, it worked for Germany in the 1930s didn’t it…) Luckily for those of us suffering because Americans couldn’t pay their mortgages, plenty of small US towns are stepping up to help us out by..you got it..printing their own cash!
According to estimates there are now around 75 seperate currencies in circulation around the country, from Ithaca Hours in NY to the ironically named Detroit Cheers.
In Detroit, where unemployment stands at 22 per cent, three businessmen are distributing more than $4,500 worth of Detroit Cheers for customers to spend in any of a dozen shops.”The world is just now reeling from economic chaos. In Detroit, that’s how we always roll,” Jerry Belanger, a local restaurateur and one of the trio, told the Detroit News.
Here at Electric Spectre we do business in used military goods, but it’s nice to know all those Dairy Queen vouchers we saved will be worth something in the future.
LINK (Telegraph)
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December 2, 2008 – 1:59 am
Tired of queing at the ATM while the person in front of you seemingly arranges a mortgage? Time to take a cue (see what I did there?) from the armed forces of Zimbabwe, who, when faced with that very situation recently, struck apon a novel solution- simply go on a tooled up riotous looting spree! While tempers may have been affected by the current water shortage/cholera troubles, it’s pretty much a case of wish-fulfilment for anyone who has tried to pay in a cheque on a Saturday afternoon- Barclays, take note (and don’t take your lunch at the same time as your customers). Nice to see Mugabe’s goverment working smoothly as usual.
LINK(Zimbabwe Times)
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October 30, 2008 – 12:55 am
This Friday, most of the world will be dressing up as The Joker and trying to elicit candy from strangers. The population of London however, will be cramming their consumer-holes full to bursting as the terrible behemoth that is Westfield mall throws open it’s doors for the first time. Obviously I’ll be there, mainly because you get free shit on opening days, but because I walk past this fucker every day, ( and I’m y’know…investigative…or a peeping tom…)I sneaked in early today and peeked. No other building in the city quite defines both ‘Awesome’ and ‘Fucking Terrifying’ so well! I’m all for innovative architecture, but seeing Hugo Boss suspended in a giant Ice-Spider’s web isn’t what I had in mind. Neither are the massive signs, simply reading ‘Choice‘ scattered about the place. I tried looking at them ironically but have come to the conclusion that the whole thing is waaay too ‘They Live‘ for my liking, although buildings that base their aesthetic on John carpenter films are always a bonus. Anyway, you lazy bastards who won’t pay the congestion charge-get your fat asses down to W12 this weekend!
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