After managing a whole week without mentioning MJ, proof positive that many fans had waaaaay to much time on their hands…a video so terrifying it will have you bricking it!

Occasionally it’s a struggle finding suitable stories to cover here at the Spectre, but just occasionally the kind of morbid comedy destruction that we specialise in just drops into our laps. So it is then, that we travel down Mexico way, where mourners are out in their thousands, showing respect too…Two midget Luchadors who were poisoned by fake hookers.

Alberto and Alejandro Jimenez, better known as La Parkita - Little Death - and Espectrito Jr. had been entertaining the bogus tarts in their hotel after a match, when it’s beleived they were fed mickey finns resulting in their untimely demise.

LINK

Electric Spectre prides itself on its knowledge of action flicks, sci fi, Paul Verhoeven films and anybody with large muscles.  Now, we know that we are all lamenting the recent rape of childhood memories in the shape of The Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, Terminator Salvation et al and also worrying ourselves sleepless over the announcements concerning remakes of Total Recall, the A Team and Robocop (although Robocop will be directed by the guy who did Requiem for a Dream, so fingers crossed).  But somebody, somewhere in Hollywood has decided that, instead of simply remaking 80s classics, why not just make a brand new one?

Enter the most manly film we at Electric Spectre are ever likely to see.  It is called The Expendables and the plot is irrelevant.  Look at this cast list.  No seriously, look at it.

Sylvester Stallone

Jason Statham

Mickey Rourke

Jet Li

Dolph “If He Dies” Lundgren

Steve Austin (yes, that one)

Randy Couture.

Right now, if you’re embarressed to stand up, hear this.  It’s about a troop of mercenaries sent by the CIA into the jungle to bring down a drug baron.  Oh my.

It’s in production, due out 2010.

Oh, before I forget, Arnie is to have a cameo too.

LINK (ImDB)

We’ve alreadsy noted the various nutjobbery going on at the world’s largest Space Agency this week, but for those of you with an interest in Lunar exploration, not to mention watching Ragnarok unfold via YouTube, be sure to check out NASA’s homepage as the latest moon mission unfolds this summer.

The LCROSS sattelite is the first US mission into Lunar orbit in a decade, and, if the planned crash landing/hi-ex incident goes awry, it could well be it’s last, and they will kindly be livestreaming the entire event here.

Duck and cover people. Duck and cover.

Ah the cold war. Back in those heady days, the US could distract it’s citizens from looming economic downturn and spiralling fuel prices by butting heads with it’s communist rivals. Times change of course, which is no doubt why Obama has issued an official statement today telling us that the US is prepared for any eventualities should Kim Jong decide to provide Hawaiian citizens with a larger than usual firework display on Independence day.

“This administration — and our military — is fully prepared for any contingencies,” Obama said in an interview with CBS television when asked about reported North Korean intentions to fire a missile toward Hawaii on or about July 4.

NASA. The worlds number one space agency, run by dedicated men and women commited to furthering Human knowledge right? Wrong-Nasa are in fact a group of loons with access to the planets most powerful explosives, as evidenced by their latest plan:

NASA are going to BLOW UP THE MOON!!

Well, almost. Basically they are launching the LCROSS satellite, it’s mission;to search for water on the lunar surface. So far, so boring. But it’s the method that’s interesting-the probe will detonate a huge explosive device, sending an explosive plume up to 6 miles into the Moon’s atmosphere.

What could possibly go wrong?

LINK

So, you’re one of the world’s 2 remaining superpowers, and you need young recruits to fight the evil commies. How do you get a disillusioned youth on board?

Well, if you’re USAF, you take a couple of already awesome pieces of Detroit steel, and ram them full of state of the art fighter plane tech! Along with more usual mods like gull wing doors and a souped up engine, these showpieces have radar reflective paint, targeting systems and ejector seats.

Knight Rider would be proud

LINK

Remember ‘Delta Force’? For the uninitiated, it was the movie that took a newly-bearded Chuck Norris and made him cool. (I think-to be honest it could have been any early 80s Norrisathon)

“But Interceptor!Surely nothing on Earth could accomplish such a feat!” I hear you scoff. Well there was one thing that could- A flying motorbike!

While Flying Cars are all well and good (More on those later on ES), they would still mainly be used for going to the shops in between defeating the enemies of M.A.S.K. But a flying bike? Rock N’ Roll!

ES IS only sad it kindalooks like a dildo crossed with Tomas De Torquemada, but it’s a start.

LINK

Electric Spectre loves The Matrix (not least because stills from it fit nicely with our colour scheme), and it seems like we’re finally getting closer to being able to plug in and zone out. In the past we’ve reported on Honda’s attempts at mind controlled robots, and quantum computers that can hold all the information in your mind. The only problem being-how do you upload that onformation? Most people not coming with firewire as standard (I say most-there was this one girl…).

Finally however Hagan Baily of Oxfor Uni, working with a group from MIT, may have solved the problem.

Bailey’s group has been working on developing ‘Synthetic cells’, and by utilising cells with thick membranes, they have managed to plug them together and allow ions to flow between them-hey presto: Organic Circuitry!

The implications are pretty enormous, from biological machinery and computers, to the integration of circuitry directly into the body and brain. Finally, a chance to edit these posts inside my own head!

LINK (New Scientist)

You know how it is, you’ve been hit by a truck/sucked into a time-tunnel/crashed your Delorean, and you’re stuck in the 1980s. How are you going to tell your friends about the sweet body warmer and snood you just found? Thankfully, some boring nerd has taken a break from writing ‘duck hunt’ programs, and Twitter is now available for the Commodore 64!
Details are seen here in an authentically 80s-quality video.

Great news for any uniped wood-nymphs today, thanks to Italy’s Royal Soc. of Chemistry.

It seems that woods carboniferous nature makes it the perfect template for growing new bones -after it’s been mashed up, decomposed and had ‘calcium, Hydrogen and Oxygen added’ (so…air and milk then…).

The process still requires a phosphate donor, but should mean a distict lack of Tin Woodsmen in the future.

LINK

Bloody great Bengal Tigers are ES’ second fave animal (after the Platypus), so it’s heartening to see news that combines huge stripy killing machines with advanced ballistics.

According to Raza Syed, of Boston’s Northeastern University, a 350lb object would need to be travelling at around 26mph to clear a 12.5 foot barrier.

“Hmmmm, very interesting” I hear you mumble as your eyes glaze over. But, how about we substitute a female Tiger for the object, and the Tiger enclosure at San Fransisco zoo for the barrier?

You can see where this is going I’m sure, suffice to say, there was much blood and gore.

Ever wanted to crack open the planet and throw the school bully into the resulting lava lake? Then here’s the device for you!

The major problem with technology’s relentless drive toward nano-sizing itself, is that it leaves fat handed twats like yours truly making old-person style noises about buttons being “too fiddly”, or accidentally sending tweets that read “oan gooming tu da shoop” (Yes, my tweets are that boring, mainly because my twitterberry is a pile of old rubbish).
Well, worries over thanks to this little beauty, produced by the University of Toronto.
The Nanotouch has a 6 CM screen with a touchscreen back and front, which means we can all look forward to a credit card sized iPhone soon!

Here at ES, we like the moving pictures, oh yes we do! So it comes to pass that in the name of corporate whoredom, we have launched our very own film blog over at slashingtheseats.net.

It’s very early days but there’s a nice red and white layout and plenty of stuff to truncate yor hungry hungry eyeballs with. Obviously, we are looking to develop things, so feel free to email suggestions or contributions over at the EpicWinMedia home site; who knows? Maybe you too can be an interweb icon!

In the future, we all know that terrible machine armies will stalk the Earth, forcing Humanity into slavery as…Batter Mixers?

Yep, at least after judgement day we can look forward to a tasty breakfast before a day in the Uranium mines, thanks to our new faveourite metallic pal;

Okonomiyaki, a fantastically pointless use of technology currently on display at the International Food Machinery Expo in (where else?) Tokyo.